Rules of the Road

The transportation system here in China is very different from places less crowded. Despite the masses, however, there are comparitively few accidents. Here are a few of the daily guidelines followed that ensure this relative safety.

1.)The solid yellow line in the center of the road is to guide the taxis who drive on it. Just keep close to it; either side is fine.

2.) Pedestrians are free to cross wherever and whenever they choose. You can stay in shape by running in front of oncoming traffic, especially buses, they really get the blood pumping, playing Frogger in rush hour traffic and scaling median barricades to cross six lanes of traffic. Just watch for open manholes. Walk in the street as much as possible, it is much safer that way. (See Rule 5)

3.) If you are a woman passenger on a bike or motorcycle, be a lady, sit side saddle. No one wants to see those stylish skirts and tights get messed up. It also makes dismount easier, say, in an accident!

4.) If you drive, you must use your horn! Each vehicle has a horn blast requirement for each month. Penalties are incurred if your quota is not met. Blaring at nothing at all is allowed.

5.) If there is roadwork, heavy traffic, or if you just prefer a more scenic route, no problem. The sidewalks here are extra wide. Just jump the curb and proceed. Caution not necessary. Most pedestrians walk in the street anyway. (See Rule 2)

6.) Riding the bus requires quick thinking, coordination, and love of neighbor. You must quickly decide which bus to take, which of that number is less crowded and quickly squeeze your way on board. Balance your bags in one hand while holding on to the rail with the other to climb the steep and sometimes wet steps. Don't forget to swipe you bus card or drop money in the tiny slot provided. Use your teeth if necessary and hurry, there are thirty people waiting on you. You must love your neighbor because him arm is in your face and your bags are in another's lap. If you are young and strong, please give your seat to someone who is not. Pregnant women, mothers with children, the elderly and the sick take precedence. The green seats are reserved.

7.) If you are a cyclist, don't buy a helmet, reflectors, mirrors or lights, these are unnecessary expenses. A mask is a good investment however, as you will be sucking exhaust from the bus you can reach out and touch. Stay close to other cyclists in heavy traffic. There is safety in numbers as long as no one gets bumped. Cover your seat with duct tape and a plastic bag. This protects it from the rain and prevents theft.

8.) Dogs in the road trump all other traffic rules! Do not hit the dog! Most of them will not move even if you use your horn repeatedly, so please move into oncoming traffic to avoid them.

9.) When boarding planes, don't wait for the announcement to board. A passenger will stand up to stretch and that is the signal. Hurry and line up. The announcement will not be made until everyone is already at the door. Those in the middle of the plane board first so please check your ticket.

10.) Above all, keep your eyes open. Expect the unexpected. It's a common occurrence.

mandy

“The only way to solve the traffic problems of the country is to pass a law that only paid-for cars are allowed to use the highways. That would make traffic so scarce, we could use our boulevards for children's playgrounds.”
Will Rogers